Life with Dee

Creating a beautiful life...

When I look back…

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While looking for something on my old PC this evening I got caught up in some old emails I had saved. Way back in 2006 a number of us on a Yahoo email list wrote on the topic, “Someday when I look back upon my life…”. This is what I wrote:

When I look back upon my life I want it to be full of memories of rocking children and grandchildren. I want shelves and shelves of filled photo albums that chronicle a full and happy life with people I love. I want to be able to browse through scrapbooks that bring back fond memories of places we have traveled and I especially hope there will be a very treasured one with pictures of Europe. I want several guest books that will bring to mind the many people we have welcomed into our home through the years. 

I hope my many books are well-thumbed and contain hand-written notes expressing some of my thoughts while reading them. I hope I live someplace with enough room for my piano and that I keep it in tune because I still play regularly, if not well.

I hope my kitchen is still a place where family and friends gather to share food and fellowship. Where the pantry always contains the makings of a quick meal for last minute guests and the refrigerator holds something delicious to drink. Of course I have no doubt there will be a tea kettle at the ready and always plenty of Earl Grey.

I hope my desk is stacked with various projects I am working on and that at least one book with my name on the cover has a special place among the handful of books I keep nearby.

I hope David and I have lots of quiet evenings snuggled up on a comfy sofa (with a few pet hairs) by the fire, or sipping a cool drink on a patio, porch or balcony. Evenings in which we reminisce about our courtship when we spent our Friday nights cruising in our ’66 Mustangs. Remembering all the adorable things our kids used to say when they were little. Talking about the amazing places we have traveled and the way those travels have enriched our lives. I hope we have lots of crazy fun times to recall and a few memories that we whisper about.

And then I hope we have to hurry up and get dressed to go somewhere fun because while looking back is nice sometimes, living life is better.  

 ~~~~~
Hmm…looks like I need to work on some scrapbooks, print some of the many digital photos I’ve taken, and write that damn book. My piano needs tuning but at least I’m taking lessons and playing it. Oh, and that trip to Europe is still on my wish list. 

 

 

 

 

Just soak awhile…

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When I was a little girl I could walk out my backdoor, quick-step barefoot across the hot desert sand and visit my grandparents who lived around the corner from us. A row of cypress trees separated our yards, a gap in the trees providing a shady spot to cool my feet before running the rest of the way to their back porch. If I got there early enough I could have a cup of hot tea with Grandma. Sitting at the gray formica table, I’d sip Lipton tea from a Melmac cup and saucer. I’ve loved the sweet and milky brew since toddlerhood.

 

My cousin, Sue, lived next door. The two of us spent the bulk of our childhood together, usually “playing house” in our grandparents’ den. We also spent many a night together there, whispering and giggling under the soft, Downy-scented sheets in the guest room.

 

When we crawled out of bed in the morning Grandma would fix us each a cup of tea and tell us to “soak awhile”. I’ve scoured the internet for any mention of this saying but without success. We understood it to mean “sit quietly for a bit” but I have no idea where she got the phrase. I wish I had thought to ask her. Maybe her mother had said it to her and her many siblings when she was a little girl. Grandma’s parents were Irish and Dutch so perhaps the saying comes from one of those languages. Whatever the origins, I remember with fondness the many mornings I “soaked awhile” at Grandma’s house, a cup of tea in hand.

 

In recent weeks I’ve changed up my morning routine. Instead of heading straight for the computer at my desk I now start my morning in our library/music room. David makes hot tea in an insulated Klean Kanteen for me every morning then puts it and a china cup and saucer on the little table by my chair. Lured by the promise of Earl Grey I slip downstairs in my robe, curl up under a cosy afghan and just soak awhile.

 

Morning tea

Sweet Tea and Saltines ~ Childhood Memories From a Simpler Time

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The summers of my childhood were a gentle time of long, sunny days spent playing with my cousins and brothers. My cousin and best friend in the whole wide world lived next door. Nearly every summer morning Sue and I would load up our doll strollers and push them along the hard-packed desert sand path to our grandparents’ house. The backyards of the three houses adjoined and formed our world. We never had to ask – we knew we were always welcome at Grandma’s house.

Sweet Tea and Saltines

 

Someday I’ll tell you all about playing house in Grandma’s den, something which Sue and I spent countless hours doing. But today I want to share our stories of the front yard. My grandparents’ front yard was carpeted in thick, soft, well-watered grass. My grandpa often called me “Barefoot Sally” and I loved the feel of the cool lawn on my feet.

In the early years the yard was enclosed by a white wood fence which, if I remember correctly, was later replaced by chain link. Grandma loved roses and had them growing around the perimeter, just inside the fence. There were two huge elm trees which provided cool shade and something for the boys to climb. I wasn’t even remotely a tomboy so tree-climbing wasn’t generally on my agenda, although I do recall sitting in one of the trees reading a book one time.

There was a mother duck and her babies under one of the trees, something like this:

They weren’t plastic, though. I think they were made of cement. I just spent an inordinate amount of time online trying to find some but to no avail. I suppose that means I won’t be adding a set to my own front yard anytime soon.

But back to my story. Grandma also had several aluminum, webbed lawn chairs and folding lounge chairs like the one pictured at the top of this post. Everyone seemed to have some of these back in the 60s and early 70s. They were sturdy, lightweight and easy to repair if the webbing needed to be replaced. (I’m resisting the urge to order the one I have pictured – it’s on eBay right now.) They also made fantastic kid forts.

With a couple of Grandma’s thin, soft, old blankets and several lawn chairs, we’d build forts on the lawn then play inside our Downy-scented creation. I don’t recall everything we pretended but I do know we often played that we were shipwrecked on an island and had to build a shelter.

While playing house with our dolls was something Sue and I did by ourselves, our games on the lawn always included the boys. I’m not sure whose idea it was but I can remember playing “communion” in the front yard at least once. Grandma always had a pitcher of sweet tea made (I have no idea how many she must have made a day with so many thirsty grandchildren running in and out of the house) and she always had saltine crackers. I doubt we told her our plans when we took tea and crackers outside and I don’t recall who performed the sacrament. But I do remember solemnly partaking of sweet tea and saltines with my brothers and cousins in a childish enactment of religious remembrance.

Even though those carefree summer days of childhood are long past I am still occasionally flooded with memories of that rare and precious time. On a breezy summer day when the humidity is uncharacteristically low…when the sun is bright and the sky is a certain shade of blue…when the leaves rustle in just that particular way…in those fleeting moments I am, once again, a child in my grandparents’ front yard sharing sweet tea and saltines in perfect communion.

 

Summer date night

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This was David’s first car. He bought it at age 15 and this is the car we dated in. Before our son turned 16, the two of them rebuilt it. Unfortunately they did such a stellar job that it seemed too nice to drive much. Chris ended up driving our old pickup most of the time instead. For the most part it just sits in our garage. I’ve been begging David to take me out in it. A week or two ago, out of the blue, he decided to join the Mustang Club of America. He polished and waxed the beauty and last night he took me out on a date in it. Ah, sweet memories. 
Rowdy Folk
Ordinarily we wouldn’t go out so late on a Thursday but we received a text message from our friend, Aaron, that his band, Rowdy Folk, would be performing. Well, who can turn that down? David was going to take me out for dinner first but I had hamburger that I needed to cook so we (he) grilled burgers and we ate at home first. 
David then checked and refilled fluids in the Mustang and started her up. It hadn’t been driven in about 3 years but we crossed our fingers and headed to town. Bear in mind, the car doesn’t have air conditioning. We didn’t think much about that as teenagers in Southern California but we are, ahem, older now and Oklahoma summers can be brutal. However it was actually quite nice last night. David did suggest I not put too much time into fixing my hair since we would be operating the 2/60 a/c – roll down two windows and drive 60 mph. I joked that I needed a silk scarf to tie over my head like the glamourous movie stars of the 50s and 60s. 
Something like this:

I didn’t find this charming video until I started looking for something for this post but you can bet I’ll be giving it a try soon. I don’t have any silk head scarves but I did recall that one of the lovely young women who attended our Happyland Music Fest had left one behind (yes, we still have a lot of unclaimed items from that event). I didn’t think she’d mind if I borrowed it so I simply tied it under my chin and off we went. It did keep my hair from going wild in the breeze from open car windows. I think I might be in the market for some vintage scarves now. Ha!

It was a fun night, hanging out with friends and listening to music. I could have done without the raucous cowboys who showed up, though. Well, except for the polite, older gentleman in the black cowboy hat who bought me two drinks during the course of the night. He asked David’s permission, tipped his hat and called me “ma’am”. The rest of them, though? Obnoxious.

But despite the cowboys we had a fantastic night. As we drove home well after midnight (yes, we’re nuts) we enjoyed the cool, night air. The moon was bright and it was pretty much perfect. We shared a kiss in the car before David parked it back in the garage. We may no longer be teenagers but we do still know how to have fun.

For my mom on Mother’s Day

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My friend, Leanne, wrote a moving tribute to her mother in honor of Mother’s Day. Sadly, her mother is no longer living and I’ll bet Leanne wishes she could have shared her “Gifts for my Mom” post before she died. Her post inspired me to write one of my own and since I’m fortunate enough to still have my mom I got to print a copy of this and include it in her Mother’s Day gift.

Dear Mom,

On this Mother’s Day I thought I would share a list of some of the things I appreciate about you. As a mother myself I’ll bet you wonder sometimes which things your kids remember and whether or not your efforts were appreciated. I doubt any kid truly understands the sacrifices of a parent. It isn’t until we have our own children that we begin to get an inkling of what is involved. Often it is the seemingly little things that mean a lot in retrospect. So here are some of the things I am thankful for:

1.  You drove us to a private school which was at least a 20 minute drive each way every day for years. And you did so without killing either of my brothers who fought every morning over who got to sit in the front seat.

2.  You taught me how to thoroughly clean a bathroom and how to make your delicious potato salad. Both of these skills come in handy on a regular basis.

3.  You taught me how to drive our old ’62 Chevy and as a 13 year old would occasionally let Sue and me drive those few blocks to the bakery where we would buy cokes and packages of candy cigarettes. I’m not sure if you knew about the cigarettes but we loved pretending we were grown-ups out driving by ourselves and “smoking”.

4.  You made my brothers attend my school choir concerts while reminding them of how many of their football and baseball games (and practices) I attended for them.

5.  You and Aunt Kay did one of the bravest/craziest things imaginable and took four kids in an over-packed station wagon from California to visit relatives in Oklahoma, Missouri and Tennessee. The two of you taught us to sing old Girl Scout songs and Tennessee Ernie Ford’s “16 Tons”, in between letting us stop at a ridiculous number of Stuckey’s and various roadside shops selling souvenirs. It was one of my favorite trips as a kid.

6.  You occasionally made an additional trip to our school to bring us hamburgers and fries from Naugles for our lunch. We were always the envy of our friends on those days. I also appreciate the fact that you didn’t make me eat yucky peanut butter and jelly sandwiches but made tuna several days a week. I’m going to continue to tell myself that there wasn’t as much mercury in it back then.

7.  You spent hours driving around with me looking for my lost dog, Buttons. The fact that I spotted him sitting under a Joshua tree in a very unlikely location after praying that I’d find him was a turning point in my personal faith.

8.  You always stood up for us in the face of unfairness at school. When I finally broke down crying and told you about a certain incident, you didn’t hesitate to give that teacher a piece of your mind. You also told the school principal that you had no intentions of sewing stupid-looking lace on the bottom of my “too short” dresses, nor would you buy me a new wardrobe for the last couple of weeks of school. You were prepared to let me skip those last days if necessary. I finished out the school year without any further  humiliating trips to the office to have the length of my dresses measured. Although I must admit I had hoped I could have just stayed home those last couple of weeks.

9.  You let us roller skate in the house. In fact, I’m pretty sure it was your idea since you did it, too. You also sometimes tap danced on the front porch.

10.  You would sometimes indulge my request to play “Flight of the Bumblebees” on the piano at bedtime.

11.  You would take me on spur-of-the-moment shopping trips to the mall in San Bernardino. You bought me the same relatively expensive bras and underwear that you wore when most of my friends were still wearing plain cotton stuff from discount stores. And when, at about age 15, I decided that it was time to move on from “Love’s Baby Soft” and “Charlie” colognes, you started letting me get “Shalimar” on our shopping trips. I’m still wearing it 35 years later.

12.  You fixed lunch for David and me most days when we were in high school. By the time we drove home we had very little time to actually eat but you always had it ready and waiting for us.

13.  You took care of my kids when I was in nursing school. Being away from them was one of the hardest things for me to do but knowing they were with someone who loved them made it bearable.

14.  You were always there when the kids were sick enough to see a doctor, usually with a Beanie Baby for them.

15.  I know without a doubt that if I ever need you all I have to do is call – day or night – and you’ll be there. Not everyone has that and I truly hope I’ve been able to pass along that same sense of security to my own children.

Thank you, Mom. Happy Mother’s Day! I love you.

Remembering…

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Today would have been my grandmother’s 97th birthday.  She passed away almost a year ago and if anything, I miss her more as time goes by.  A couple of weeks ago I was in an antique store and found myself in tears while looking at household objects which reminded me of her.  She was such a huge part of my life and I was blessed to have had her for so long. 

Grandma, thank you for your example and your love.  I miss you.

P.S. We had an earthquake here about an hour ago.  Yes, in Oklahoma.  As soon as I felt it I posted about it on Facebook to see if others felt it, too.  They did.  In fact, it was all over Facebook in a matter of minutes, well before it came out on the news.  I just love the fact that Facebook and Twitter now usually have the latest news first.  Apparently it was centered not far from Norman and registered 4.5.  Someone said it registered 4.2 here in Ada.  It was pretty substantial for Oklahoma as it rattled everything in the house for a good 20 seconds or so.  Brought back memories of growing up in California.

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